I Think I Accidentally Went On A Date With A Girl

I Think I Accidentally Went On A Date With A Girl

As soon as the words came out of her mouth I wanted to scream “What?!” then run. But I didn’t, I played it cool. That’s probably how I got into the situation.

I’m in London living, learning about myself, and exploring. I was in my third month and things were going rather well. I had written a freelance story for a popular women’s magazine about what brought me to London and the experience up until that point. Many women that I did not know read my story and emailed me congratulations in addition to well wishes. I was thrilled that people were digging the story and into my adventure. One woman was even nice enough to let me know that she was actually located in London and offered to meet up for drinks. My automatic thought was wow how sweet of her. I had gone on the trip to meet new people and experience new things, so I didn’t give responding to the email with interest a second thought. The young lady responded and our plans were set.

Let’s call my new email buddy Tina. So Tina suggested that we meet at a café near the Angel tube station, which wasn’t too far from my place. When I first walked out of the tube station I saw an older looking black man lurking around as if he were waiting on someone. I thought to myself what if this is a trick! What if you’re not meeting with a friendly woman at all, but instead some creepy man?!

It took a few minutes to calm myself so that I wouldn’t freak out. I realized that I really didn’t know who the heck I was meeting. I probably should have given someone who cares about me a heads up that I was meeting up with a complete and total stranger. I silenced the noise in my head and rationalized that at least I was going to be in a well-lit, public place. If things felt strange I could exit stage left at a moments notice.

I walked into the quite café and that’s when I spotted a trendy looking black girl sitting on a stool by the window. I figured this had to be her. We made eye contact and I said her name aloud with an invisible question mark behind it. She greeted me with a bubbly yes so I hopped on the stool next to her. We chatted for a moment then decided to head to grab food before meeting her friends at a Jazz bar to see one of them play.

It was a short walk to the burger place down the street. But somewhere in the five minutes that it took to walk, Tina announced that she hadn’t got much work done after 3 o’clock that day. I inquired why just to be polite. That’s when she let me know that it had been because she’d spent the rest of her day reading the stories on my blog. I thought to myself that it wasn’t something I would have admitted, but I appreciated her interest in my work.

The burger spot was bustling. It was overflowing with an after work crowd. Seemed like the type that just wanted a low maintenance dinner with a beer. Over burgers and onion rings I asked questions to try to learn a bit more about who I’d met up with. Being the writer who is curious about relationships, I wanted to know all about the dating scene in London as well. What had Tina’s experiences been like? But she had one simple answer, “I don’t date.” I paused. Ok so maybe she had just come out of a relationship and decided to take a break. I probed for a reason. She was short and dry with a similar response. She even implied a disinterest in dating. I thought to myself that her reaction was a bit weird, but hey what did I know.

Tina suggested that we make our way to the Jazz bar to catch the performance. I was excited to experience Jazz in London. When we entered the dive bar looking scene, the band was in full swing. The lead singer was belting out tunes with one of the most soothing, melodic voices you ever wanted to hear. I was impressed. Not until the end of his set, when he addressed the crowd, did I hear his British accent. There were musicians all over waiting to be called up to jam. I was open to the vibe of the night and having a good time with new people. Tina leaned in and yelled to ask what I wanted to drink. I quickly responded with the same question. I told her that it was on me since she had insisted on paying for our burgers. Her face scrunched up as if she was not pleased with my offer. She continued to comment, “I’ll take care of the drinks and I don’t expect anything in return, unlike the date from your blog.”

Awkward.

That was my immediate thought. I wasn’t sure why she had even brought that up. Luckily her guy friend came over and rescued the uneasy moment by demanding to know what we were drinking. He was a regular at the bar and patiently waiting his turn to play in the band. She formally introduced me to her friend and he invited us to go sit at his table.

The music was live and the crowd was too. I sat in between Tina and her friend as I sipped my whisky sour. Somehow we began chatting about New Orleans. Having visited many times, I mentioned to her musician friend that he would probably love the city. I told them of Bourbon Street and all of the good times to be had in a city as lively with music history as New Orleans. Tina leaned over my lap and shouted above the music to her friend, “Yeah, we should go…so you and I can compete to see who can get the most girls.”

I Think I Accidentally Went On A Date With A Girl

I was instantly uncomfortable. I knew that I was supposed to hear that comment and that’s what made it even worse. I wanted to exit stage left immediately. Avoid any other craziness that was to potentially come in this disaster of a situation. My mind couldn’t stop replaying what she said. I wanted to be polite and stick around to listen to her friend’s set, but I was having a hard time. A moment later the emcee called up her friend to take part in the next jam session. I sat fixated intently on the performance trying to avoid any small talk.

Once her friend’s set was over he offered to give her and I a ride home. I reluctantly accepted. When we came close enough to my flat I blurted out, “Oh, you can stop here. This is fine.”

I wanted the next few moments to speed past. I fumbled out of the backseat barely being able to sputter, “Thanks for inviting me out.”

Then it happened.

She exclaimed, “wait,” and grabbed her door to get out of the car too.

I cursed under my breath and thought WTF! What is she up to now! I walked around the back of the car toward the side of the street that my flat was on. Wouldn’t you know it; she met me at the back of the car with her arms stretched open. I went ahead and participated in the strangest goodbye hug ever. Part of me felt silly like maybe she wasn’t trying to be fresh with me. Maybe I was over-reacting, but my gut told me yes, yes she was. Either way I wasn’t feeling it. I walked into my flat feeling drained. I sat on the edge of the bed. It was like the Twilight zone when I started replaying all of the moments and realizing things that now made sense, which I couldn’t see before. I knew then that I wasn’t being paranoid. Besides, it wasn’t like I had never encountered lesbians before. My roommate sophomore year in college was a lesbian and we got along just fine. She was the best roomie. Never once did I feel like she was trying to be fresh with me.

The next day Tina text me to ask if I was busy. She wanted to grab drinks. I politely responded thanks, but no thanks. I never confronted her because I wasn’t invested in the friendship and I didn’t feel the need. However, I will say that trying to hang out with someone under the wrong pretense will never garner the results that you want. Not a good idea.

Don’t forget that you can keep up with your girl daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel

Family Convo

Glamorous young couple face to face

A typical day with my family. It’s my 84 year-old grandmother’s birthday. We’re all chatting and somehow we start talking about body piercings. Then someone brings up having piercings below the belt. Somehow my aunt thought that I said I had my vag pierced. I quickly corrected her. I had simply commented that I know people who have their lady parts decorated. The chatter increased as everyone cringed. My grandmother especially. I turned to her and asked, “Gram would you get yours pierced if someone offered you a million dollars?”

She exclaimed, “Oh hell no! Ain’t nobody piercing my cooch*e.”

We all laughed hysterically. I didn’t anticipate that reaction.

Later on, I started thinking. Does the piercing really give you that much extra pleasure? It seems like you would have to endure the pain before you ultimately reach the pleasure. They say that it is one of the fastest healing piercings but I don’t know if that is enough of a selling point. People with experience please feel free to weigh in.

So then my mind continues to mull over the idea. I had the thought, What if your partner asked you to get such a piercing? Is that like asking someone to get your name tatted on them? Okay maybe not exactly the same, but I think that my reaction would be similar. Pure shock. But my question is to you…would you do it? If your lover begged and tried to convince you of the benefits?

So let’s say that you go through with it. Then you break up. Bummer, but you and your decorative genitals move on. How do you think that your new lovers will respond to your little surprise? Is there an implied notion that you are a freak of the week? I think that it takes a special person to sign up to endure this experience so maybe the new lover will have a high appreciation for such an individual. I guess there is only one way to find out :-).

Well these are the things that I talk about with my family that ignite further contemplation from me. I know, crazy thing for an entire family to be talking about. But hey, we are just different.

Don’t forget that you can keep up with your girl daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel

Secret Online Dating

onlie-dating-kiss

It’s a typical Friday evening just like so many others prior. A select few girlfriends (minus the one with the boyfriend) gathered at the home of the hostess for the week. The red wine was flowing, the subtle jams are strumming along in the background, and the chit-chat of three long-time friends keep the familiar energy going.

After discussing the highs and lows of the work week, that good old topic of relationships rears its familiar head.  All of the women were accomplished in their careers, but as of lately they began to discuss more and more about companionship and their desire to find it.  One of the ladies shared that her married co-worker had recently convinced her to register on Match.com. She wasn’t all the way sold on the idea. It made her feel slightly desperate.

One of her friends chimed in to break it down to her in terms that she could relate to. Her friend went on to explain that it is the new way to date among busy professionals who rarely make time for romance. When they do look up from their desk and realize that they would like a date, their possibilities are slim to none since they don’t take the time to go out and meet new people.

As though it were a source of entertainment, the ladies gathered around a desk and began scrolling through the prospects that matched up with their friend’s online dating profile. There were plenty of men that the women unanimously clumped into the no category for one reason or another. The ladies were having a good time laughing and joking their  way through this scavenger hunt of sorts. But with one click that would all change. The image of the next prospect popped up on the screen and the women gasped in unison.

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They had come across the unthinkable. He was handsome, no children, great career, and his overall profile was impressive. However, he wasn’t a stranger. He was a man that they knew. But not just someone who they all knew casually. This eligible bachelor plastered on the computer screen was their girlfriend’s man. The friend who was absent from the Friday night party because she was spending quality time with her man. The ladies were silent for a moment. None of them wanted to be the  first to speak and say the wrong thing.

“Well that killed our buzz.”

The owner of the dating account chimed in, “Uh, yeah. That source of entertainment was short-lived.”

The ladies relocated to the couch and filled up their wine glasses. They needed a boost of potion to deal with their new information. After a bit of discussion, they were unclear as to how they should proceed with the discovery. Their friend was happy.  She had been in this relationship for almost two years. All signs pointed away from the conclusion that it was some left over dating profile from before they met.  They didn’t know what her man’s intentions were with the profile but it didn’t seem right.

Now they were left with a dilemma, to tell their friend what they had found, or not?

What would you do? Comment below and let us know what you think or if you’ve been in a similar situation.

Don’t forget that you can keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel

San Francisco Preseason Love Happy Hour

Last Thursday I hosted the first Preseason Love Happy Hour event in San Francisco. I hosted this event in anticipation of my debut novel Preseason Love (available October 21). This was my way of gathering great people for good conversation and fun times.

This event was the first of many more to come. The guests mixed and mingled while sipping on happy hour cocktails. The energy was positive and uplifting.

I really appreciate everyone that came out to support.

Preseason Love Happy Hour With Ahyiana Angel

Image By: Ryan Hoang

Ahyiana Angel

Image By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Preseason Love Available October 21st

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Preseason Love Available October 21st

Preseason Love Happy Hour With Ahyiana Angel

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Conversation starters

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Conversation starters

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Image By: Ryan Hoang

Image By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

Photo By: Ryan Hoang

 

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Sugar Cafe in San Francisco

Photo By: Ryan Hoang, Sugar Cafe in San Francisco

I’m encouraging all of my peeps to show their support by pre-ordering their copy of Preseason Love today and telling a friend :-).

Don’t forget that you can keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo

Ahyiana Angel

 

What Backpacking Through Europe Taught Me About Myself

Ahyiana Angel Essence 7-27-14

On the last day of my travels through Europe, I felt small. It was a realization that this world is massive and I have so much more to explore. I didn’t feel defeated. I felt empowered. When I planned to spend 110 days in Europe, I admittedly expected that the experience would change me in a drastic Oprah aha-moment type of way. During the second half of the trip, as I stared off into the picturesque scenery from the Pont Neuf Bridge in Paris, I realized I wasn’t a disastrous person in need of great change. I was an eager person itching to experience more. 

Read full story here.

Don’t forget that you can keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo

Ahyiana Angel

Is Rape a Joke to Our Youth?

Iamjada

On the 4th of July my aunt and uncle allowed their son, my sixteen-year-old cousin, to have a few friends over. The small gathering consisted of a few boys and two girls. At the end of the night the boys stayed over and the girls needed to make their way home. Unbeknownst to my uncle, who had ran to the store, the girls began walking. Just two teenagers, oblivious of the potential danger, headed clear across the city at 1:30 in the morning. They hadn’t got far when my uncle spotted them on his way back from the store. He pulled over. He demanded to know what they were doing walking at that time of morning. The girls hopped in his car and he headed back home to scold his son before dropping the two girls off. My uncle was disappointed that his son had used such poor judgment in allowing his young lady friends to venture out into the night alone. He used this incident as a teaching moment for all of the boys staying at the house that night. His words were not light when he expressed his concern that they did not see the error in this scenario. “You were raised better than that, you know better than that,” he said to his son. He also shared with the young ladies that they should never tolerate that type of disrespectful behavior from anyone…his son included.

My first thought when my uncle shared this story was that my cousin’s young friends could have been kidnapped, raped, or killed during that innocent ninety-minute walk. Then last week the Internet was buzzing with the news of a Houston teen, Jada, whose alleged rape went viral. It is believed that she was slipped a laced cocktail at a house party, became unconscious, only to wake up not knowing what happened to her. It seems that the assault was not reported initially, which is giving some people cause to speculate if she was in fact raped. Outrage followed when her alleged attackers thought that it would be a brilliant idea to post images of, what seemed to be, her unconscious half clothed body all over social media. They treated it as a joke. A sickening hashtag #jadapose soon followed with disturbing images of mostly young boys mimicking the posing of her limp body.

How could anyone closely associated to this incident or not, make light of such a violating experience? Is rape now something to joke about? Parents can’t monitor their children constantly, but just as my uncle did in the above story, you have to take time out to talk to your children in those teachable moments. I wonder if the parents of the children who made light of this situation are even aware of their children’s insensitive actions? Do the participants of the viral explosion even realize how disrespectful their actions were? Not just disrespectful to the young lady Jada, but to themselves as well. A potential rape situation is not a trendy thing to be a part of. It’s not excusable to make light of someone’s potential pain and embarrassment. Yet somehow I get the feeling that point is being lost on our youth.

It seems apparent these days that young impressionable minds are becoming driven by the idea of social media celebrity. They lack good sense when it comes to the lure of likes and retweets. They are looking for perceived notoriety at all costs. Is social media truly making all of us insensitive? Is it creating the largest follower mentality that we will ever know?

Read more…

Don’t forget that you can keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel

Preseason Love Happy Hour – SF

Everyone is invited! Come out JULY 31 and enjoy cocktails and conversations with a quality crowd in San Francisco.

This is my first time hosting in the city so let’s make it special! Feel free to tell a friend, bring a friend, or even drag a friend along :-).

RSVP to AhyianaAngelEvents@gmail.com

xoxo

Ahyiana Angel

Ahyiana Angel_Preseason Love Happy Hour_SF

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Suck It And Love It

whispering-in-mans-ear

We were gathered around the table, drinks in hand, chatting and sipping like ladies typically do when engaging in girl’s night out festivities. Our booth was just big enough to fit five women and their chic Thursday night fashions. Two single, two dating, and one taken, aka married. Our second round was quickly coming to a close when the married friend slammed her glass against the table. She tilted her head back, and with her eyes to the ceiling, she declared, “I really don’t like sucking d*ck you guys!”

A hush fell over the table. Some faces turned to concern and others to confusion. Okay, I’ll admit that I was in the confused category. My naive little fantasy mind just reasoned that you had to be a member of the EDSC (Expert D*ck Sucking Club) to get someone to commit to forever with you, to marry you. Hell, for you to even get fianc’d. That’s my word. Yes, I made it up and I like it.

Anyway, I needed more so I inquired, “But you’re married. Who the hell married your non d*ck sucking ass?!”

She’s my boo thang, plus I was at her wedding so it was a rhetorical question. I knew her husband. He was a stand up gentleman. Maybe he was simply being extremely patient with his wife.

Then another friend, little miss sassy, eagerly chimed in, “Well personally, I love it! And my man loves it too.” We couldn’t help but laugh. Although, strangely enough she may have sparked a good question: if you like performing fellatio does that lend you to being better at it?

After a few slick comments and many questions, we got down to the basics. My married friend didn’t like the act. She didn’t feel that she was good at fellatio. It wasn’t something that she was eager to master. Maybe her insecurity about her skill level was clouding her ability to be great. However, she knew that she’d better get into the act or risk her husband getting his needs met elsewhere. Even though there wasn’t any known threat of him cheating she didn’t want to take that risk.

This made me think. How important is oral in a relationship? Sure, not every man requires it, but I’m guessing that if you took a survey most adults would admit to enjoying good oral. So even if it’s not a requirement for happiness, it may be an enjoyable added bonus.

Miss sassy, who thoroughly enjoyed performing fellatio, ran down a list of her favorite tips while we all sat captivated. One of the key things that she offered was to relax and be open to the interaction.

A few weeks later we received an update from our married girlfriend. She reported that her skill level was consistently progressing and her husband had been pleased with her improvements. Maybe she just needed to talk about it to gain that positive encouragement…I don’t know.

So what do you think…do you have to like performing fellatio to be great at doing it? In general do most women enjoy being the giver? Let me know your thoughts in the comments section below.

Don’t forget that you can keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel

 

 

Robin Thicke – Get Her Back

thicke-feet

Robin Thicke’s latest album “Paula” is dedicated to his estranged wife, actress Paula Patton. This is no secret. The media has been all over this new project because of the obvious juicy nature, which they love. Some people are wondering if this is a publicity stunt for the promotion of the album. Hot 97 radio personality Ebro asked Thicke directly about the potential publicity factor in a recent interview. He denied an ulterior motive being in play. The looming troubles of the couple’s relationship had been playing out for months.

I recently posted an image to Instagram that read “Someone who loves you wouldn’t put themselves in a position to lose you.” Now it seems that Thicke has successfully lost Patton. He is vying to get her back, on a public stage. Is this a smart way to go about attempting to right your wrongs? Can a public display of remorse make a person fall back into a lover’s arms?

rt-paula-cover

Most people don’t want their friends and family to know that they are having problems in their relationship, so I’m sure that they would not want the world to know. It’s embarrassing to find out that your partner has been cheating on you. We knew that Thicke had been dragged through the mud in the media for a few scandalous moments. Although, Patton remained mum through it all. Thicke has since admitted that he was a habitual liar. The result of this latest music project seems to be when the lies stop. But is he being self-centered? Is all of this about him and his loss, his desire to get his wife back, his desire to have his family back? He has decided to come clean and face his bad decisions head on, but does that make it okay to drag her business through the mud with him? It makes you wonder if all of the attention will simply drive her further away from reconciling with him?

I’m not sure what his plan is, but in many cases people need time before they can even consider reconciliation. I just wonder if this album is jamming what he wants down her throat. When do you let go? How do you decide that you have pleaded your case and now you have to let life take its course? I guess we will just have to see how this works out for the smooth crooner.

In the meantime, share your thoughts via social media or below. Would you be flattered or humiliated by this type of public campaign for your forgiveness?

Keep up with me daily on Twitter and Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel.

xoxo
Ahyiana Angel